Oxytocin is a hormone that plays a role in many aspects of parenthood, from feelings of closeness and bonding, to causing the contractions that result in the birth of a baby. Doing things that elevate our levels of oxytocin can help with the challenges of caring for a newborn and increase our peace and joy in everyday life. Here are some suggestions for activities that can bring a sense of safety, relaxation, and pleasure even in the chaos of new motherhood.
- Find moments of connection in routine infant care tasks. Talk, sing, and interact with your baby as you change their diaper or clothes. If you contact nap, take some time to really enjoy the closeness, feel, smell of your baby. Try some skin-to-skin time for an extra burst of the cozy hormones. Life as a new mom can be overwhelming and exhausting, but making an effort to protect that “bubble” around you and your baby, even if only occasionally, is always worth it.
- Go outside. If you can’t right now, try sitting by an open window. Fresh air, sunshine, and a change of scene can help with mood and sleep for both you and your baby.
- Connect with a friend. Reach out in whatever way feels doable for you. A quick phone call can remind you that you are not alone. Meeting up in person can be even better. A good friend won’t care that your house is a mess, or if you show up with unwashed hair and spit up on your shirt.
- Eat something you enjoy. Oxytocin is also link to the digestive system and warm, comforting foods and drinks are especially helpful. A bowl of homemade soup, a cup of tea, or a piece of dark chocolate might not seem like much, but it could be just the pick-me-up you need right now.
- Listen to your favorite music. It could be energetic, soothing, sad, nostalgic, or even angry. Sometimes we just need to feel our emotions and move through them. Other times it can be the energy of the music itself that helps us feel better. A living room dance party with your little one is a great way to pass the time and bring a smile to your face.
- Watch something funny. Speaking of smiling, laughter is a wonderful oxytocin booster. Putting on your favorite funny show, scrolling through memes, or just spending some time watching funny animal videos can give you a brain break and shift your mood.
- Listen to what your body needs. With the responsibilities of parenthood, we can’t always step away and do whatever we want to in the moment. But that doesn’t mean we should ignore our needs and desires all the time. Maybe that requires shifting some expectations, asking for help, or seeking out creative alternatives, but finding ways to do things you enjoy will also make you a better, happier mom who is more available to her little ones. Whether it is more rest or more activities, more alone time or more company, pay attention to what your body is asking for. You deserve to be heard and treated with kindness and respect, even by yourself.
Looking for more support on your journey of care and connection? Untangling Motherhood is starting on Monday, May 13. We will explore the reasons why modern motherhood is so tough on us and how to build sustainable joy through self-care and community through video lessons, virtual community, and small group Zoom calls. Use code MOTHERSDAY at checkout for $100 off this session only, good through Sunday, May 12.